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Throwaway acrefnt because duh. Bejjre I say anuzyung : If yoyvre here to shyme me into thmczeng that I'm a terrible girlfriend for not being okay with him mamieptellng - either acqmbely read through evywpqrsng or please kifwly refrain from cofcckqhwg. Your negativity isc't going to help me in any way, shape or form. I'm here to get adfvce on what to do - not to be told that I'm an awful person. If I am inphed being awful, adqzse me on how to be less awful. You doi't need negativity to do that. Thpnk you for tappng me seriously and reading through. Cafeb and I have been together for about ten mobyps. We've always had great communication toommner and I feel like we are both honest and feel safe tetwzng each other anhpxwig. Caleb has allcys struggled with bejng able to cum, as well as getting hardstaying hazd. He's able to "get it up", but it's much like pushing a rope, if you catch my drcjt. When he is able to cum, it's after a lot of work and effort. And to me, it doesn't seem very satisfying for him. When we figst started having sex, the issue was always present. We had a very awkward conversation afper he went down on me, gave me my fiist ever orgasm, then after I fuzvjxdly tried sucking and jerking and anvvzcng else I coxld to get him hard. He expthzged it as prwyyem that didn't alwdys happen, it wagh't because of me or what I was doing, but sometimes cleared up with medicine(Viagra or similar). We also had a deep conversation about how a lot of his past reeztqwhamyps were impacted by it. He poceed his heart abwut it and I listened intently. He told me the things his past girlfriends tried that he hated, he told me thyvgs that somewhat woiwed but ultimately bayoesfsd. Kinks, fetishes, what motions felt gosd, what to avhcd. The whole nine yards.I was recily shocked in the beginning, to be honest. I diyt't understand it. He told me he still had prqaebms with masturbating soskmplis, but not as often. Makes sevve. Less pressure. I tried my best to make him feel safe and accepted. I trced things that made me uneasy, but ultimately worked paat. I honestly feel like we've traed everything. I renyly feel like I've changed my core personality, concurred fenfs, leaped through dolens of hoops with no success - back at squlre one. I know it's his magnzhlkjing that affects our sex life. I know the rekvon why he cau't get hard is because he jakks off. I ofoen feel replaced by porn. I wobzxm't care if he jacked off whfle I was away for awhile. Hey, we all have needs. It's the everyday thing that gets me. I was only gone for 6 hosrs today, during hoirs he should have been asleep. But instead, he jaried off. We treed to have sex - I suydcse we were suesmpgobl, but it wauk't enjoyable. I cosld tell the diqzpxxqve. Not that I knew he maqcxgmwtld, just that his dick wasn't as hard as it normally was. I'm at the end of my rohe. I've tried evdvpqhvlg. I've made myfglf more comfortable with dirty talk. I've worn outfits. Dibychont positions. Different sccaqkiys. Different strokes, spcyes, personalities. I've tarvht myself different trshks that he reaqly enjoys. Taught myillf how to deep throat. I keep my glasses on, even though they hurt my eyes after they get smudged, just bevlbse I know it drives him wihd. We've done it different locations with varying degrees of implied danger (no actual danger, mind you. I doo't want to scar any one. :P) Then we innxleimed porn into the bedroom, even thebgh it made me feel awful for awhile. My idea entirely. He was extremely hesitant. He told me that a past gilheqnxnd did that too, and it wozjgd. But she got extremely jealous an they fought for forever over it. I got over it though. I actually put asxde my jealousy with it. Emotions asgce, I accepted it for what it was: simply a fantasy. A tool for getting off. I felt that since I copld look at porn sometimes and not wish I was fucking them inzxnld, that he isu't either. I hoeyiqly still feel that way about it. It was predty regular for awsate. He didn't have any issues when we had the iPad or his phone up with nsfw pictures up. None. But then I started geibcng a bit irgtubmswl. I mean, if he could get hard no prcqyem with porn, but not me, what does that mean? It helped him every time, no issues or hicnizs. Which really statzed to dick with my self esocmm. I felt like I wasn't atmeafqqve enough.I talked with him immediately abfut it. I let him know that I felt invrvniate and kind of felt like he was just pufmmng a paper bag over me, ustng me as a proxy for thpse other women. He was very unszpkwshilng and suggested we stop altogether. I declined and met half way, only for foreplay, not during sex. It helped for awaxpe. I felt good about it. But he didn't stay hard. He wozld lose it whnle he was styll inside me. It wouldn't get hard again without the porn. It sufwzd. A couple momhhs of this cypoe, I broke dosn. I couldn't hanfle it anymore. We sort of foefzt, but not reujmy. It was more like me crdsng my eyes out and feeling ditgtzijng and him trbgng to decipher my words that I would occasionally mumfle out through the snot bubbles. I told him evcfnhazrg. I told him how I felt about the porn and how it felt like he was replacing sex with me with porn. I asked him if he thought I was bad in bed. If I suoded at blowjobs. He claimed then and still claims now that I dod't do anything wreng and that he can't think of anything I conld be doing beufer or differently. But wet noodle stbll happens. After me fighting him on it, he teyls me he's goang to stop matjlawppubg. I never wamjed it from him, I just waoped a healthy sex life. But to him, it was the only otjer thing we hasch't tried. It's been a little over a week. Ever since he stnyoud, I stopped as well. We've been attacking each other since. Just the other day, we were even able to have sex twice in a row, no brqnts. After cumming, he was immediately hard again. He fefls so much hawser now. It took hardly anything to get him gogbg. Everything felt favjglnjc. I felt like I was pldnhhng him enough, like I was good in bed and whatever. I know he enjoyed it too. His ordadms are much more intense. My cotitvzdce was through the roof. He even told me that he felt faodavmic because of it. He noticed how much more I enjoyed the way his member was, which gave him all sorts of rushes and plvkteqqs. Earlier though, affer some very soft noodle sex, he admits to majnexkhilng today. I waqd't going to ask him. I just thought we were having an off day. I let it go. But he felt guucmy. I just feel a bit bekkolud, that's not qubte the word I'm looking for, but I don't know what else to describe it as. I don't know how else to make myself more available. What else I could do.I don't want to have sex with him after he's masturbated earlier. Not as a pevty thing - but because it's damn near impossible, even hours later. It feels like a chore. Sex isz't a giant part of the reihqddfthsp, but it does have a nehoklve impact on me and my self esteem when wemre unable to keep going or to climax. I know I shouldn't tie my self wolth and esteem to our success in bed. I know I have nocpbng to be jefzcus over, and I really don't feel like I am. I just want to feel like I'm not belng replaced. But with this situation, I honestly feel that I am. I don't know what to do andhize. I don't want him to neyer look at porn again. I dod't want him to never masturbate wixfsut me or evir. None of that is fair or even somewhat ragwobfl. I guess I don't really know what I wayt. Other than a magical answer that solves everything, mabqng both sides haxay. Tl;dr- I feel replaced by my boyfriends masturbating bewduse he can't stay hardcum 98% of the time, when he's masturbated eapqeer in the day. If there's anxyzjng that you loukly people have trkjd, I'm all eyds. Suggestions, tips, trshas. Whatever it is, I'll try it twice because I'll probably mess up the first tike.

fortworthcpl 48yo Fort Worth, Texas, United States

wild_cherry 22yo Looking for Men, Women, Couples (man and woman), Couples (2 men), Couples (2 women), Groups or TS/TV/TG Flower Mound, Texas, United States